Year of changes

So much has happened since I've encountered two huge losses.
My best friend since 2004, Reva's passing Last November.
Also losing my father on January 13th of this year.

I lost a second cousin, a four year old and he drowned on the 2nd.
(My father's birthday)
It very hard for the family and mine.
really hard for me since it was a small child

and it was unexpected.

I thought about these losses in recent.
Then again I thought about my gains too.

I have a very good friend now thats been a great support.
I'm usually one to keep to myself but if she notices im too quiet talks to me.
Seems to really have appreciated me and I have appreciated her.

I'm slowly becoming a little more social.
I can be a bit shy and closed off.
I have realized much in late.


Some are these things

"I'm not alone regardless of how I feel."

I always felt alone regardless of what i say and do.
Never felt i related much with others.
However in late i've found others seeking me out
for advice and in return standing by me.


"I'm very strong within but also very kind."

I've endured much but I keep going.
I noticed a girl in late with a bit of similar experiences.
She is very bitter, cold and very me-centric.
she asked me for advice and tried tearing me a new one
on several occassions but i tried to provide her some support.

In the end wound up hating me for our differences.
A few people found her quite jealous of me?
I think was their words.

I was honestly baffled by her.
In the end i still hope she helps herself.

I'm basically still working on myself.
I've been single for years?
I think a couple at least.
feels like forever but i know its not.